A few weeks ago I was reading the hard news from the reputable source, BuzzFeed. Yeah I know, but what can I say I am half Millennial, we have already covered this.
Anyway one of their quizzes was about into which house in Harry Potter your cat would be sorted. Well, duh! When presented with a scientific opportunity like this of course I am going to participate.
So I decided to take the quiz for my cat, Lucy.
Lucy is 13 and ornery as shit, but I love her dearly. I had to answer hard hitting questions about her napping and eating habits. There were questions about her choices in play activities and where she would be found hanging out in Hogwarts. It was intense stuff.
Butterflies fluttered in my tummy as I pressed the last answer and Lucy was sorted into her house… A Gryffindor!!!
Now even though I have been sorted into the clearly superior house of Ravenclaw, I was still incredibly proud of my furry little Gryffindor. I tugged at Ryan and contentedly waved my phone in front of his face showing him Lucy’s new house.
He was not nearly as impressed as he should have been, but he did ask me where his cat, Ethel, was sorted. To which I replied, “Take the damn quiz yourself and find out.” He was having none of that. Apparently he is above spending his precious time taking on-line quizzes for cats. I don’t know what is wrong with him. Being the devoted wife I am, I told him I would take the quiz for Ethel as well.
She’s a Slytherin.
Ryan didn’t believe me. He couldn’t believe it could possibly be his cat that was tempted by the dark arts. I promise I was honest though. I suspect Ethel’s habit of unprompted biting and her inability to tolerate lap sitting had something to do with the results. Ryan pouted, and I explained I was sorry that his kitty was clearly lacking in moral fiber, but this was a scientifically based test and Ethel had obviously been sorted correctly.
I would never embarrass my husband by telling the world how much he pouted about his cat being a Slytherin. I am too faithful a wife to say that he was grumpy about it every time I brought it up. And I promise, I only brought it up like 50 more times or so…that day.